Jack Lambert's mustache is widely recognized as the best middle linebacker in NFL history. Jack always prided himself on the strength on his lip follicles, and as a result one night after countless bottles of cheap vodka, and endless handfuls of vicodin Jack challenged the fattest women in Pennsylvania to a mustache ride. Although the mustache is considered one of the strongest ever, it buckled under the immense pressure and Jack lost his 4 front teeth.
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