Michael Cera

It appears actor Micheal Cera was caught Friday in Beverly Hills channeling his inner Clark Gable. When asked by the paparazzi about his new lip rug, Cera quipped, "I'm a famous Hollywood actor, I'm filthy rich, and I still can't seal the deal with the ladies, so I took the next logical step, and grew a mustache to get me some tail."

Martin 'Hot Sauce' Miller

Martin grew up in Croatia as a clam farmer, but after growing his amazing mustache at the age of 9, he feared his facial hair would permanently stink of fish rot, so he fled the family farm and hitch hiked across the Atlantic where he ended up in northern Minnesota working as a lumber jack, until he fell in love with the son of a baptist preacher. Together they fled to San Francisco, where they opened the world's first poodle grooming parlor in 1893, and lived happily ever after.

Wayne Kelly

Wayne Kelly has been diligently growing his first mustache, and he sent me this photograph to document his journey. He said thus far the mustache lifestyle is working better than any male enhancement could, because he no longer gets mean mugged by other guys at the gym, and yesterday the lady behind the counter at his neighborhood Lebanese restaurant gave him an extra glass of arak absolutely free.

First Mustache

Baby Cade keeping up the family tradition.

Tim Lincecum Tries Out a New Mustache

Although it barely resembles anything Burt Reynolds would call a mustache, by definition that growth on Tim Lincecum's upper lip is indeed a mustache, and since it got his cover charge waived at a strip club last night it is official.

Nick Kessin

My neighbor Nick used to be a professional cage fighter and night club bouncer until he grew his first mustache and realized he didn't need all that over the top macho bullshit anymore because he had a well groomed mustache. With masculinity firmly in hand, Nick was able to pursue his true passion for nature photography and his mustache now runs the world's foremost natural desert photography website.

Mustache Memories

Although a mustache doesn't give you super natural powers, it does improve your quality of life in just about every aspect, from making you more efficient at work, to increasing your stamina in bed, and it can even help you make better financial decisions. Which for some odd reason reminds me of when I grew my first mustache, it was the summer 1998, and it was a soft and fuzzy little 'stache, and only days after I let the peach fuzz go, my premature mustache helped me memorize every single word to the entire Sublime (self titled) album. It is a fond day in my memory as I was refinishing an old door for friend's mother, and I was having the time of my life stripping the old paint off the door with paint thinner in an unventilated room getting high as hell off the fumes, singing along with Sublime, and constantly stoking my upper lip. I still can't fathom how many brain cells I lost that day, but it was worth it, damn it!