Another Mustache Sets Another Record

Last night the Philadelphia Eagles, led by head coach Andy Reid's mustache, set a record for most points scored in the first quarter by a road team in NFL history.
This mustache takes me back to a time when mustaches commanded respect and authority, when a mustache was always the hero who saved the day, and in the end always got the girl, or in this case got the dozen doughnuts, see even morbid obesity couldn't hold this mustache back from greatness.