Friday, March 5, 2010
RIP: David "The Animal" Paterson
David "The Animal" Paterson came out of the womb with this lip sweater many years ago, and was raised by wild badgers, who taught him the art of kung fu. When he turned 14 the badger colony sent him out on his own to become a man. On his journey David stumbled upon a strip club, where his mustache became employed as a bouncer. While bouncing at the the "gentlemen's club" David met a nice Canadian girl named Michelle. He instantly took Michelle to Las Vegas and made her his wife, and immediately after the wedding ceremony he was hit by a tour bus and died.